oh my gosh...I'm gonna be a mom!
I'm 4 months in and I think it's finally starting to hit me that my life has officially changed forever. With my tummy now protruding, sciatica, constant fatigue,the occasional morning sickness and the fact that I can no longer button the pants that I wore to work last week - reality is hitting me like a ton of bricks. I've always wanted to be a mother, and while I welcome this change, I can't help but to wonder what exactly these changes will be. How with my relationship with my husband evolve? Will I have the same group of friends? How will our finances change? Are we going to be good parents?
It's crazy how life changes. This time last year we were settling into our new apartment in Florida, I had my own office at work - I never thought I'd be back in New York again and I wasn't really thinking of starting a family as yet. But here I am in the Big Apple again, and on that freezing Sunday evening, after much denial, I took a home pregnancy test and everything changed that instant the screen read PREGNANT. I should share that store soon - it's quite funny!
I know life throws curve balls at us, but I'm a firm believer in the saying "If you don't plan, you plan to fail". I'm working towards being debt free by the time Baby gets here...well, with the exception of my enormous student loans (damn you Sallie Mae) - everything else should be cleared up. I've been working like a mad man on my business so that I can have the same or greater income when I go on maternity leave...and so that I can leave New York again. As much as I love New York, I realize that I don't want to live here permanently anymore - visiting is fine - but I'd like my kids to be able to play outside, go to the beach and do outdoor activities all year round. It could also be the fact that I'm becoming a mother now, I want to live close to my mother again, so returning to Florida is something I'd eventually like to do.
By the way, Mothers Day was strange. Some people told me Happy Mothers Day, some said Happy Mommy To Be Day, some said they couldn't wait till next year to tell me Happy Mothers Day and some people were just confused on what to do...I thought it was hilarious since I was confused myself. It was weird to hear Happy Mothers Day for the first time, not because the baby isn't here yet...but because I'm not used to being referred to as a mom as yet, lol...guess I better get used to it :)